It has been a while, my minions since I have given you my wisdom and guidance. This is neither.. this is half serious crap I want to spit out.. which means that it is half in fun.. but with some truth.. I live far away from most of you.. so I don't care.. Gas prices are high and the likelyhood of you driving all the way out here to beat me with bluntishly sharp objects are pretty slim.
It is amazing how comedians can say things that you think but were afraid to say.. especially for a reserved person such as myself... Stay at Home Moms.. supposed to be the hardest job on the planet.. I call shennanigans on that one... "We should get paid hundreds of thousands of dollars for what we do..." you always hear the harpies harping.. Yeah.. sending the kids to nap anytime you want to watch a show.. that is REALLY tough.. bending over to put the DVD in the tray for them to watch some inane Kid Einstein show.. OOOHhh feel the burn.. Yeah yeah.. any job you do whilst still in your jammies.. big deal. And before you say "Brooks.. You dont understand what we go through, you thoughtless pig!!" I SMACK YOU WITH MY RING HAND!! and say "Oh but I do.. I did the Mr. Mom thing and though sometimes it was a pain in the ass, it wasn't like being an pasty Euro-descent guy on the top of a warehouse roof hanging pipe in the middle of July" so.. to you ladies.. Thanks for spitting out more annoying little drool bags.. fix your mid-morning cocktail and park your ever expanding butt on the couch and be glad you duped your poor hubby into not putting you to work. LOL And the funniest part is.. when that poor bastard walks in the door from a long day of actual work.. the kids will get passed off to him because you are tired from dealing with the little demon spawn all day.. Soooooooo That is why men die before women do.. because they WANT to.. they need the rest.. Ok.. So I do not think you have it totally easy... but anytime I hear it described as the hardest job ever.. I want to slap a bitch. Most jobs will FIRE you if you pour a glass of wine at work..
I hate those frikkin commercials about the homeless, f-ed up pets with Sarah McLachlan singing in the background.. am I bad for thinking that we may be on to something to solve world hunger??? just sayin.. Little fuzzie bastard would eat us if the tables were turned... YOU KNOW they would.. We solve the unwanted pet over-population.. and fill hungry tummies..
Oh, holy crap... my wife is playing somgs from Glee after playing some awesome 80's music.. (sigh) I cant legally uppercut her I suppose.. Oh well.. only about 35 more years before I can drop...
